To mark 2025 Deaf Awareness Week (5th-11th May), DPA Secretary Kathie Buffery writes about her experiences as a deaf person, and shares her thoughts on effective communication with the d/Deaf community
The theme of 2025 Deaf Awareness Week theme is ‘beyond silence’. This year, we are focusing on breaking down the barriers to full accessibility for those with hearing loss, and celebrating how diversely deaf people communicate, whether through lip reading, BSL or with an assistive device.
Life as a person with a hearing loss can be scary. Let me explain.
For those who don’t know me, I’m Kathie – a nearly 50 year old deaf and neurodivergent parent. I have a profound hearing loss: having been diagnosed as having a severe hearing loss when I was 23, my hearing has gradually deteriorated, bringing me to be diagnosed as having a profound loss nine years ago. I knew I was losing more of my hearing, but sitting in the audiology exam room, having what is the equivalent of a functional hearing test and not being able to hear one set of voices at all – and being told at the end of it I was profoundly deaf – was devastating, even though I knew already.
If you listened to me, you wouldn’t realise that I am deaf – apart from a few subtle differences in the way I talk – unless you were a speech therapist.
Communicating with me or any d/Deaf person is simple:
- Speak clearly, don’t shout or over-enunciate your words (this may get you a funny look from me) as it doesn’t help at all. (Think the movie ‘Hear no Evil, See no Evil’.)
- Make sure the lighting in the room is sufficient. If the light is behind, you all I will see is a shadow.
- Face me – I honestly can’t hear you if you don’t.
- Try not to cover your mouth, it’s a habit for some.
- Make sure you have my attention – this can be by coming into my sight or tapping me to get my attention. If I don’t know you are talking to me, I won’t be able to listen.
This is just me personally, but these tips tend to be able to be used with friends, family, colleagues or members of the public.
One thing that I get a lot especially when I don’t hear someone, is “Oh, it doesn’t matter”. It does matter. When you do this, it excludes people from the conversation and makes them feel even more isolated than they already are.
In social situations I struggle to hear people especially when a lot of people are talking or there is a lot of background noise. I can only focus on one person at a time and its exhausting. I rely on my friends and partner for help to understand conversations, so when you say, “It doesn’t matter”, it does – it matters to me.
Living with a hearing loss means I don’t hear cars, trains, my own child crying or fire alarms. I am constantly on my guard. At work I struggle in meetings, video calls can be a struggle. Simply having lunch in a loud room can be hard.
Communicating with someone with a hearing loss just needs a few simple things to make us included, but please remember to ask the person what they need – every person with a hearing loss is unique and will have different needs. ∎